10 Relationship Truths You May Not Want to Hear

Creating great relationships requires a general understanding and acceptance of these 10 basic relationship truths. Learn them; live by them. 1.    The only person you have the ability and power to change is you. Begging, pleading or raging and demanding that others change, waste energy. Change your moves—stop hoping they will change theirs. 2.    You […]

Falling out of Love with Your Significant Other? Talk About It.

Far too many couples are breaking up seemingly on a whim. One partner comes home and tells the other partner they’re no longer happy and they want out of the relationship. The other partner is shocked and feels blindsided. The idea that a spouse or significant other would suddenly announce they want out is beyond […]

10 Behaviors that Destroy Healthy Relationships

Creating healthy relationships requires mindfulness, not a PhD. A past mentor of mine use to say to the couples he was working with, “If you go out in the rain without an umbrella, you’re going to get wet. Don’t blame me for getting wet.” Relationships are the same thing—if you treat those around you poorly, […]

Empowerment Starts with Speaking Your Truth

What if you shared your honest opinions—time and time again? What if you told your partner what you really think—each time s/he asks? What if you stepped in when the black girl, homosexual boy or Muslim woman is being harassed and dared to say that the bullying is about the harasser’s own insecurity, not the […]

The Underlying Message of Silence—Intended or Unintended

“Inherent in Your Silence is Acceptance” ~LMB The underlying message of silence, like it or not, is acceptance. This is particularly true for hurtful offenses. In fact, the bigger the offense—responded to by silence—the louder a message of acceptance is being conveyed. This is an often unspoken truth in courtrooms, offices and even homes. •   […]

Changing the World, Your Marriage or Your Job, Requires Action

“Inherent in your silence is acceptance” ~LMB Many people talk about wanting to stop racism, address patriarchy, end misogyny and shut down oppression of all groups. Men and women of all races and sexual orientations have come out of the woodwork to march against these issues—particularly in this past year. Marching, talking against and wanting […]

Life Choices: Get Others Out of Your Head Unless They’re Living Your Life

Life often throws people a curve ball that leaves them floundering a bit from the hit. A marriage is rocked by an affair, an employee is laid off, a family member dies, a student fails out of college and on and on. Often loved ones respond to these unfortunate events by telling us what to […]

10 Tenets to Healthy Relationships

Healthy relationships don’t just magically happen. There are several key ingredients that are present in every healthy relationship and some that are necessarily absent. Too many people normalize harmful behaviors and dismiss the importance of positive behaviors. The bottom-line is however you can’t have great relationships if you and others aren’t great in them. If […]

Healthy Self-Esteem: Don’t Allow Others to Define You

The thoughts, opinions and beliefs others have about your sense of worth have absolutely nothing to do with your level of worth. In a world where so many are judging others based on their race, looks, gender, sexual orientation and on and on, many individuals can begin to feel small. Don’t buy in. Don’t ever […]

The Loss of Self and Finding Yourself Again

Finding Yourself Again Women I work with often tell me they’ve lost themselves. Somewhere along the way, they stopped seeing things through their own lenses, stopped taking care of their needs and stopped paying attention to what they wanted. Instead, they took care of the kids, tried to be there for their husbands, worked hard […]