Dismissiveness: Remove These 5 Statements from Your Communication

When it comes to upsets and conflict, one of the worst things you can do is respond in a way that is dismissive or minimizing. The last thing in the world people want to hear is you telling them their upset isn’t really a problem. That response is not calming. It won’t reassure them. And […]

The 5 Most Common Edges and What to Do About Them (Part I)

Our “edge” is that relationally-dysfunctional move we do in times of stress or conflict. It’s the move we do when we’re reactive, rather than mindful. ALL human beings have edges. And most of us have two or three edges that show up time and time again with anyone and everyone. You see, the thing about […]

Assumptions: It’s Not What You Think

Being mindful of why we do what we do in the world can be hard work; interpreting why others do what they do, on top of monitoring ourselves, is a recipe for disaster. The problem with interpreting others’ actions is that the things we make up about another person’s behavior is almost always negatively skewed: […]