“Humane kindness is constantly humming in the background of the best of relationships; Find a way to make it hum in yours.” ~Lisa Merlo-Booth
Radically New Relationships™ have humane kindness constantly running in the background. In romantic relationships, humane kindness turns into cherishing that continually shows up in the minutia in the following ways:
- A loving smile
- A playful joke
- A kind note left on the bathroom mirror
- A purposeful check-in about a significant event or tough meeting
- Holding hands in bed
- Doing an extra chore without being asked
- Randomly encouraging your partner to sleep in while you take care of the morning
- Whispering, “I love you” at an unexpected time
- Laughing with love at your partner’s bad joke
- Listening with an open heart to truly take in your partner’s perspective—without arguing, “fixing,” dismissing, or minimizing their thoughts, feelings, or opinions
Cherishing is a game-changer in relationships. Hard times aren’t nearly as difficult when you have an atmosphere of kindness in your home. Honoring the humanity in each of you—no matter what—creates a forcefield of love, respect, and security that serves to insulate the relationship from the everyday stressors of life. A bonus to an already potent force is that being kind often takes only a second of your time.
Sadly, kindness and cherishing are often missing in long-term relationships. People get tired, parenting gets demanding, and work becomes stressful. Couples end up trying to keep their heads above water, and cherishing can quickly fall by the wayside. Don’t let cherishing disintegrate in your relationship. It only takes a moment to cherish, and that moment can be the saving grace in your marriage. Take a moment.
Challenge:
- Take the time to bring humane kindness into your life—with strangers, co-workers, and friends.
- Bring cherishing into your home daily.
- Be sure that cherishing is reciprocal and flows both ways; one-way, cherishing grows old and will burn out the relationship.