“You deserve to be treated well at ALL times—even in anger or upset. If you don’t know this fact, others won’t honor this fact.” ~Lisa Merlo-Booth
There is a harmful notion in our world that yelling, screaming, name-calling, and disrespect are all “normal.” There are endless cultural messages that confirm this sentiment as well:
- “S/he deserved to be put in their place.”
- “Love is a battlefield.”
- “Love hurts.”
- “Spare the rod, spoil the child.”
- “I slashed a hole in all four tires. Maybe next time, he’ll think before he cheats.”
The massages are endless, and the results are the same: a cultural paradigm for destructive relationships. The bottom line is no one has the right to be physically, emotionally, psychologically aggressive, or harmful to anyone. The poor behavior of one person is not a green light for the poor behavior of another.
- You always have the right to protect yourself; however, don’t confuse protection with an attack.
- You have the right to be angry; however, you do not have the right to be aggressive or intimidating.
- You have the right to be upset; however, you don’t have the right to retaliate.
- You have the right to be frustrated, annoyed, sad, angry, or hurt: however, don’t think for a moment that strong feelings give you the right to lash out, shame, rage, or be disrespectful or emotionally harmful to the other person.
When creating great relationships—with lovers, children, friends, colleagues, or strangers, stop buying into the harmful cultural messages that have driven so many connections and businesses into the ground. Raise the bar on your actions and the actions of those around you and change the game. Radically New Relationships™ feels nourishing, enriching, and honoring in good times and bad; Don’t settle for less. And refuse to make excuses for the poor behavior of anyone—including yourself.
Challenge: Creating a Radically New Culture™ starts with you raising the bar. Raise the bar in your home, on the job, and in the world. Stop being complicit by excusing hurtful behavior, turning a blind eye to it, or engaging in it yourself. You deserve better; our world deserves better.