I will be taking a few weeks off for the summer and sharing a few past weekly tips. This week’s is a great reminder to set your relational bar high—for you and for those around you. Enjoy!
“The bar you set determines who will enter your life. Set your bar high.” ~LMB
You deserve to be treated well by all people at all times. If you don’t know that, don’t believe it or don’t think you’re worthy of kind treatment, you will attract those who will not treat you well. Not surprisingly, you will then make excuses for their behavior: “He didn’t mean what he said, he was just angry.” “She treats me like that because she wants me to do better.” “S/he’s my boss and has high standards for me.”
Over time, you will begin to question, blame and feel bad about yourself. The longer you’re around people who don’t treat you well, the more common this behavior will become. The more you blame yourself, the lower you set the bar for other people in your life—family, friends and even jobs. You will literally be training yourself to accept less and less and as a result you will feel and think less of yourself. The less you think of yourself, the more you will surround yourself with those who won’t treat you well and the vicious cycle begins.
The reality is, if you don’t think highly enough of yourself to raise the bar regarding those you allow into your life, then those who come into your life will not think highly of you either. Subsequently, you will likely be involved with people who belittle you, intimidate, rage, speak to you with contempt, dismiss your thoughts and opinions, are constantly defensive and seldom accountable and on and on. You may even fool yourself into thinking that all people are like this—they are NOT.
Challenge: Love yourself enough to raise the bar on who you allow into your life—it will save you tremendous pain down the road. Be sure they treat you will at all times. If they stop treating you well, then find the courage to require them to change or leave.