Straight Talk Blog
Change Is in the Minutia
"Change is in the minutia. When times are hard, focus on the baby steps." ~LMB In the hardest of times, we often forget the little things. When life feels overwhelming, remember to BREATHE. Breathe. Slow yourself down, tune in, and ground yourself. Take as many deep...
Creating Healthy Relationships: Why Emotional Safety Matters
"Healthy, connected relationships cannot happen without safety on every level." ~LMB Are you safe towards others? I mean: Are you REALLY safe to others? Are the people in your life tiptoeing around your anger? Is your spouse afraid to be honest about their feelings or...
Taking in Difficult Feedback With Accountability, Courage, and Compassion
"Shutting down or withdrawing in conflict is not the same as taking a healthy, much-needed time-out; one protects relationships while the other harms them." ~LMB Conflict, hurt feelings, upsets, and challenging conversations are vital aspects of healthy relationships,...
Avoiding Conflict Makes Intimacy and Connection Near Impossible
"Avoiding conflict makes intimacy and connection near impossible; Dare to have the hard conversations." ~LMB Few people get excited about conflicts. Disagreeing, arguing, or talking about your upset or someone else's upset is seldom comfortable. However, talking...
Transforming Your Relationships: From ‘Protecting Me’ to ‘Building We’
"Until you move from “protecting me” to “building we,” your relationships will struggle." ~LMB Relationship struggles are seldom about issues—even though couples swear that the “issue” is the problem: We have no connection and no sex. We differ in our parenting. We...
Use Your Words to Build Others Up, Not Tear Them Down
"Use your words to build others up, not tear them down." ~ LMB I believe that people underestimate the power of words every day. Whether it is a kind word shared with love or mean words thrown in anger, words have an impact. Kind words can soothe a person’s heart,...
You Should Be the Safest Person in the Lives of Your Loved Ones
"You should be the safest person in the lives of your loved ones; without exception." ~ LMB Anger is a significant problem in far too many relationships. Often, in these partnerships, one person is "hot" while the other tries to "manage the heat." Managing another...
How Do You Respond to Negative Feedback From Others?
"Explaining why you did what you did is a defensive response that creates distance, not repair." ~ Lisa Merlo-Booth Do you ever find yourself responding to someone’s upset about something you did by explaining why you did what you did? Explanations can sound like...
Understanding Relationship Complaints: Listen the First Time
"When your partner complains about a pattern of behavior you do, listen, the first time." ~LMB The key way out of a struggling relationship is finding the courage to change in the area your partner has been asking you to change for years. Too many people respond to...
Take an Honest Inventory of Your Relationships
"People want to spend time with those who feel good to be around. Be a bright light, not a black cloud." ~Lisa Merlo-Booth When clients were making bad choices in their lives and experiencing negative consequences, my mentor would often say, "If you go out in the rain...
The Work in Healthy Relationships Is Allowing Others to Be Themselves
"The work in healthy relationships is pushing yourself to appreciate, learn from, and embrace differences, not erase them." ~LMB Recognizing and embracing people for who they are is a powerful act of humanity, love, and acceptance. However, allowing others to be...
When You Truly Listen, Others Feel Genuinely Heard
“When you truly listen, others feel genuinely heard; there are few things more connecting than genuine respect for a person’s experience, thoughts, and opinions.” ~ LMB Have you ever had someone repeat the exact words you spoke to them and, yet, seem not to have taken...
Juneteenth: Uniting for Equality and Taking Meaningful Action
"Juneteenth is a powerful reminder that believing that all human beings are equal means nothing if your actions fail to support that belief." ~ LMB Juneteenth is a vital reminder of the two most basic rights allotted to every human being: freedom and absolute...
The Listening Myth: Unveiling the True Key to Relationship Success
"You can be the best listener in the world, and it doesn’t matter how well you’re “listening;” if you’re still unaccountable for your actions and their impact." ~ Lisa Merlo-Booth Listening seems to be the new “hot” button issue regarding relationships at work, at...
Stop Normalizing Harmful Behaviors
“Be careful what behaviors you normalize because what you normalize becomes the norm." ~Lisa Merlo-Booth An essential requirement in any healthy relationship, company, or culture is uncompromising safety which means that every human being is responsible for being...